Korean jokes heard in North Korea...
Koreans around the world love to laugh and tell jokes. And in North Korea you’ll find a handful of Korean jokes. Almost unique to North Korea, however, is the filtered foreign jokes that come into North Korea through tourists and North Koreans go abroad and then stick with the North Koreans - these are often jokes that Koreans understand as it fits in culturally and/or historically.
On a tour to North Korea, you will more than certainly hear a handful of Korean jokes told to you by the guides who love to make people laugh and smile. Get ready with your own Korean jokes for when you go on a trip there!
There are, of course, some traditional North Korean jokes.
And these Korean jokes are what we will take a look at first!
These are typical North Korean jokes, translated into English.
Firstly, one of the most popular and well-told North Korean jokes, written originally by a North Korean comedian.
A little boy sits at the dinner table with his family eating dinner. After drinking too much juice he announces to the table “Mummy! Mummy! I need to pee!
Embarrassed by her son’s uncouth table manners she corrects him by saying “my son! How rude of you! Next time you need to use the bathroom please come to me and say, “I want to sing a song,” this is much more polite!
“Okay, please then, I want to sing a song,” replies the boy as he is escorted from the dinner table to the bathroom.
Later that night while the house is asleep, the little boy wakes up desperately needing to use the bathroom. He tiptoes into his grandfather’s room and gently taps him on the shoulder.
“Grandfather, grandfather, please, I want to sing a song,” says the little boy. Annoyed, the grandfather wakes up and replies “what are you talking about boy?! You can’t sing a song now, it’s the middle of the night!”
“Please, grandfather! I really, really want to sing a song!” replied the boy, getting more and more desperate.
“Are you mad?! You’ll wake everyone up!” replies the grandfather.
“I really, really need to sing a song though!” says the boy. Exasperated, the grandfather sighs and says “okay, well if you really need to sing a song, do it quietly into my ear.”
There once was a heavy drinker. Every time a person told him to quit drinking alcohol for the sake of his body and health, he replied;
“Because my ancestors died because of alcohol, alcohol is my enemy. So I shall have my revenge by swallowing it”.
A Physics teacher asked a student, ‘Why do we see the lightning first and then hear the thunder?’
The student confidently replied; ‘Because my eyes are in front of my ears!’
There were two people in the market. One was selling grapes. The other one selling the walnuts.
The one selling grapes shouted: 'Grapes! Grapes! There are small seeds in big grapes and no seeds in small ones’. All the grapes were sold off in a blink of an eye. Meanwhile, the person selling the walnuts imitated him. 'Walnuts! Walnuts! There is little flesh in the big walnuts and no flesh in the small walnuts’
Everyone laughed at him.
(And presumably not so many walnuts were sold)
'My wife’s on a diet, so she rides the horse every day to lose weight’.
'Oh, does it work?’
'Yes, it does! The horse lost 40 kilograms in a month!’
An American, a Japanese, and a Korean are in a rowing boat, loaded with food. The boat is sinking. The Japanese starts throwing bottles of whisky overboard.
“Stop that!" say the other two, "We love whisky".
“We have loads of whisky in Japan, too much in fact" says the Japanese.
They continue to sink. The American starts throwing cases of cigarettes over the side, the others try to stop him.
"We have too many cigarettes in the USA" he says.
Still, they sink.
The Korean guy throws the Japanese guy and the American over the edge. They cry out to ask why he has done this.
“We have too many Japanese and Americans in Korea" he says.
There's an English man, Korean, and Japanese guy stranded on an island.
Trying to figure out how to survive, they decide to divide up responsibilities. The English man’s job is to look for food and water. The Koreans’ job is to build shelter. And the Japanese man’s job is to look for supplies like anything salvageable.
They agree to meet up again in a few hours to check on progress.
After a few hours, the Englishman has found a source of fresh water, and picked a bunch of wild fruit to eat. The Korean has finished a building a pretty good shelter that will protect them from the elements.
But the Japanese guy hasn't shown up.
The Englishman and Korean wander around the island frantically looking for the Japanese guy.
As they are rounding a tall cliff, all of a sudden, the Japanese guy jumps out and yells “supplies!”
There's a long line at the pearly gates to get into heaven. St. Peter is interviewing everyone very closely to make sure they are who they say they are. Up comes one guy.
“I'm Leonordo Da Vinci" he says.
“Prove it" says St. Peter.
So Da Vinci does an amazing painting.
"OK, welcome Mr. Da Vinci please come in!"
Next up another man, he says "I'm Albert Einstein”.
"Everyone says that, you'll have to prove it" says St. Peter.
So Einstein does a complex mathematical problem for him.
"Welcome Mr. Einstein and come in" says Peter.
Later on George W Bush arrives.
"I'm George W Bush, President of the United States" he says.
"You're the 5th George Bush today mate" says St. Peter "you have to prove it".
"How can I do that?" says Bush. "Well, Da Vinci did this painting, and Einstein did this mathematical proof" says St. Peter.
"Who? And who?" says Bush.
"Welcome to heaven Mr. President" says St Peter.
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